Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Kissing Frogs

If I could go back in time as Valentine's Day rolls around I would do this one thing. Find the guy that wrote the fairy tale about the Princess that kissed the frog and turned him into a prince. I would find that guy and grab him by the ears and slam his face on his primitive writing table until I rendered him unconscious. Then I would burn all of his manuscripts. Then I would go and trade a large Scottish man a shotgun for his Claymore sword. Claymores don't kill people. Large Scottish men with Claymores kill people. I'm just saying. And this large Scottish-American man thinks the dude that wrote this story was wrong.

I work with students. I am a student minister. How good I'm am at it, well the jury is still out. But none of the students that have sat under my teaching are serial killers. At least not yet. But I see girls making the same mistake that the princess in the story was making when she put her lips on the frog. They keep going out with frogs thinking that the power of their love can turn him into the prince of their dreams. All they ever end up with is warts. Or worse.

I find myself wanting to scream seeing girls make the same mistakes that many of their mothers made. They married the freaking frog thinking that she could change him. This myth is perpetuated in one of the dumbest movies I have ever had the displeasure of watching, A Walk to Remember. I watched this movie at the house with my wife and several of the girls in out ministry at the time. Toward the end of this movie all of the girls were crying and I was praying that Jesus would come back and make this end. This girl was able to change this frog into a prince by the power of her love and still remain pure. Girls, this is the good news. The bad news is she had cancer and died right after they got married. Wicked trade off if you ask me.

Here is the fairy tale I would like to see invade the consciousness of every girl that calls herself a child of God. I get the sense from reading Genesis 2 that God had a plan for Adam when he made Eve for him. In one concise little story God instituted marriage and gave us all something to hope for. God made Eve for Adam. She came from him. This excited him when she first came on the scene enough that he uttered the most romantic line ever (not "Don't let go Rose." or "You had me at hello."). "This is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh." OK, maybe that has lost a little something in the translation. How about this. "This woman is as much a part of me as my heart and my soul." He was excited about what God had given him. He didn't have to go hunting her. He didn't have to play the game. Too many people bring the one that they want to God and present him. I believe that God would not go to all of the trouble of tailor making someone for you and leave it up to chance and the rules of the dating game to find that person. He brought Eve to Adam and Adam to Eve.

The moral of the story for girls to a large extent and guys to a lesser one. You cannot change a person. And if that person is the person that God made for you (and made you for) why would you want to change them?


Jamie said...

This is a great blog. Really.

Except for the part where you wax sentimental about Adam and Eve. Who else did they have to squeeze by to find one another? It's not just me and the one God created for me at the booty club or on

In the wise words of pimps everywhere: "Hate the game, not the players."

Samantha said...

Good job Joseph.

I've been that stupid girl and sometimes . . .well . . a lot of times I still am that stupid girl. It's getting better but, I'm still growing.

I watch my younger cousins and get struck with the same inspiration that pushes me to scream at them until they've matured a bit more and aren't moved to date a boy based solely on the way that he looks - or how much street cred he can offer.

Yeah. . . that's how we roll.

Shawn Stinson said...

I think you missed one important piece of advice. Assuming you're referring to the "bad guys" as frogs, that means that there's still some good guys out there in the world.

You should have encouraged the girls to more closely examine their "good guy friends" to see if he might really be what God has in store for them. Maybe they should even kiss a few of those good guy friends along the way just to make sure.

As a former "good guy friend" I feel it's my responsibility to do what I can for those in that position now, the ones who don't get those kisses. They only get the "f" word, Friend.

Kristi said...

Caleb and I had conversation last night, that if you summarized it and added biblical scholarly elements, would be this blog.
I know this happened a while ago, but "Don't kiss frogs. All you get are warts" is the best advice you or anyone else has ever given me. Thank you!

Ben Hamaker said...

I know I've already told you this, but I wanted to put it up here, too.

The original tale was alot truer to life. Woman finds talking frog.
Talking frog tells woman that if she carries him home with her, he will turn into a prince and they will ride back to his kingdom. Well, she does this and.... he's still a frog. Then, he tells her she has to feed him. She holds a feast in his honor, and he eats all of the food they had stored. When he STILL doesn't turn into a frog, she tells him to bring all the valuables her family's possessed. After that, the frog said that, if only she would kiss him, he could turn into a prince. The princess kissed him. And..... the frog stayed a frog. so, she grabbed him by his back legs as he went to hop away and slammed him into the wall until it turned into froggy paste.

The moral of the story was if it looks like a frog, hops like a frog, has the manners of a frog, and finally, tastes like a frog, it is a frog.