God Don't Make Junk

I refuse to cave in to the unrealistic image that women have of what the perfect man should look like. Men are plagued by unrealistic expections and feel the pressure to have the perfect body and perfect hair and cave under the weight of these expectations.

I have gone to church with women who have no inhibitions whatsoever about telling me how I should dress or groom. Here are a few quotes I have heard over the years:

"I can tolererate the beard but its starting to get a little thick."
"Why are you wearing that shirt with those shoes?"
"You could look good every Sunday if you would just try."
"At least shave your throat."

Even as I write this my lovely wife is picking at me like one of those grooming monkeys at the zoo. This is how the conversation (one sided) is going:

Kara: You've got to let me do something about that neck. Boys come at look at this long hair growing out of your dad's forehead.

Billy: Dad, I think you're going to get bigger. (And I think to myself, "But you might not.")

So I say this: Large and hairy men of the world unite. Refuse to succumb to unrealistic expectations laid on us by magazines (GQ and Esquire) and soap operas (General Hospital). Be glorious in the way your maker made you. Grow that beard thick. And under no cirumstance shave, wax, or pluck any part of your body. You're a fur bearing mammal. That is how God made you and God don't make junk. Psalm 139:14

The Dangling Carrot(top)

Here I am sitting at work. Discussion starts about getting a $7500.00 check from the government for being a 1st time home buyer as part of the stimulus package passsed last July. I think to myself, "Hey I'm a first time home buyer. I've done my part for the economy. I have not been like the rest of the sheep in our economy and quit spending because I have been told that the world is going to end. I bought a house. I should get some of that money." One of the girls that works here is putting new windows in her house. She closed May1, 2008.

But then I hear that the cutoff date to receive this money is April. I call Kara to see when we closed and suspecting the worst. I was rewarded for my pessimism with the call back that we had closed March 20, 2008. I started to get really bummed by the idea that we had missing out because we couldn't read the crystal ball and wait until April. Before I knew the cutoff time I really started feeling as if I had earned that money. "I bought a house even in these uncertain times. I am a hero!! I just want to know where the gold at." (If you get the chance do yourself a favor and go to YouTube and search for "Leprechaun in Mobile". You will see the dude above and he is awesome.)

And then it hit me.

I am a fiscal conservative that has ranted and raved about bailouts and stimulus packages and the latest that Premiere Obama has signed into law, the "porkulus package." I don't think that any good can come from the government being involved in the market. I don't think that the government should take over health care. I don't think that the government should pay for my children to go to college. I will vote for a guy (or gal) that will give me a list of ways that he is going to stay out of my life and my wallet. I don't need to be saved. You want to know about change I can believe in. Shrinking federal government and expanding personal responsibility and accountability.

All of the above I have said in public. I believe all of that crap. And I was getting angry because I was not getting money that I felt like I was entitled to. What did I do to deserve this money? I bought a house where my children could play in the back yard and would not have to live in a van down by the river.

Ah the dangling carrot of socialism. It is a pretty carrot. But who is dangling it? Why are they dangling it? It almost had me.